Tuesday, July 25, 2006
Ab Dialogue Bole to....
Jindagi mei kabhi kisi ko kidnaap karne ka hai...to kisko karte?
Ab dekh..Gunda Mawaali log doosro ko kidnaap karte hai..ab mei Gunda-Mawaali ko hi kidnaap karoongi..wo bhi Gundo ka Baap.. SARKAR!
Ab Sarkar II ka Director Ram Gopal Varma hai na.. Usko Phone karega..
TRING TRING..
"KAUN bolreila?
-----Aaaye Raaamu, Apun EK HASEENA bol reila.. Tera SARKAAR mere SHOLAY ke addey mei..
------Bey Saaaale, CHAPPAN wala nahi..SARKAR bole to..Chota Bachchan wala..
------Aye..Jyaada NAACH mat.. Varna Chota B ka VAASTU SHAASTRA badal dalooongi..Tere ko nahi pata..apun kya kya karega..LOVE KE LIYE SAALA KUCH BHI KAREGA..
------Dhyaan se Sun, Jaldi do koka bhej..JAMES ya SATYA ke saath..bey Mereko Action dekhni hai phree mei..Ayee Shaane mat ban..Kisi EK ko hi bhejna..bole to...Bahutt COMPANY nai maangta..
-------Aye..wo saala CameraMan ko bhi bhej..ChotaB ke saath apun ko MADHURI DIXIT BANNA maangta hai..
------Abey...Oye...Jyaada Sawaal mat kar..Hit Maangta to apun ka ek Item Number Fit kar..Varna Chota B KHALLAAAAS
-----Ab Kahan aur kaise Milna hai..Wo ROAD ka naam.. sab do ghante ke baad bataongi..Abey Samjhaa kar yaar, tera budget ki tarah apun ka bhi jeb khaali hai abhi ...Ab bheja Khaali mat kar re..
------Aur Yaad Rakh... DARNA ZAROORI HAI..Police ke paas DAUD ke gaya to Bachchan ke saath tera bhi MARNA ZAROORI HAI..(EVIL LAUGH)
Ab Phone Rakh! CLICK
My thoughts: Ye Saala..sochta bahut hai..
Ram Gopal Varma's thoughts: Chikni..ki awaaz sexy hai..item number bhi karti hai..Aye Chunnilaaaaaaaal, Naya Heroine Mil gayaaaaa
Written by
Apun..
bole to..
DivineThoughts Blogger :P
Monday, July 24, 2006
Saturday, July 22, 2006
Wednesday, July 19, 2006
Intellectual Bloodshed
I set out yesterday to ask my male-buddies for a suitable parting gift for my friend Saed who is going to be doing his higher studies in Sweden. He happens to be the only Asian friend that I can associate with, and that's because we share the similar culture with a boundary-line separating us. He's a Pakistani and I am a Hindustani and we have become chums because we can talk and laugh in a common language Hindi/Urdu that has a totally different written format..but same phonetic syllables. A typical Mumbaiker confronted my keen interest in making friends across border as something that cannot be done by him, because of what "they have done to our countrymen in Mumbai Blasts". He has solemnly pledged to never consider any of my friends as 'friends' because "its sad he is a paki" and that is something that goes against him at the time being. I take this as a chance to tell you what my views are along with the contradicting views. Then I will let you be the one to decide or at the least will hope that by the end of this read, you will be broadminded enough to think twice before letting your adrenalin rush into an Intellectual Bloodshed for sake of the dear ones who have lost their lives in the recent happennings in Mumbai.
My friend felt that "They" shouldnt have done this to the simple working people, some who are sole bread earning members. But, he feels proud of the spirit of the city, which has accepted the fact that they are going to get back to work not because they are not afraid, but because they cant sleep hungry in the end of the day.
Mumbai has always been this way since ages. Its a city that lives no matter who or what dies or perishes. Muslims or Hindus hardly matter in these times because if you're a Mumbaiker then you are on the streets helping people out in floods, in earthquakes, and in bomb blasts. Yet, the same religion acts as a barrier for those who have been born across the border. Indian Muslims and Pakistani Muslims wont carry the same weight for a neutral person who wants to make a friendship as compared to a Muslim jawaan who has a certain responsibility in a small forsaken land of Kashmir. Yes, at this moment religion falls low and Nationality takes priority.
What's my verdict? "Insaan ki galti Insaan hi bhuktega..Bhagwaan nahi"( A man's mistake should be paid by a man only..not by God). If Pakistan is playing Devil out here, then where did this Pakistan come from? Somewhere from the pits of the under-world??? It came from History! Pakistan was created by HISTORY. Hatred towards each other was created by HISTORICAL massacres and incidents. If facing a Pakistani makes your mind only drift back to dead bodies that you saw broadcasted in those stations, then it is the result of the hostility border in your mind! A person "does not" want to be friends with them because HE has a problem with the mental hostility, not with the person actually. And if you consider them part of a nation who killed your people, then we should remember that we are also part of the nation that is the Living dead of Aids patients, gave birth to Veerappan, decoits, rapists and also terrorists!
Gandhiji is often blamed for the breakdown of an otherwise co-existing community. Gandhiji had a vision and He stuck to it. While during the partition, some influential leaders had ulterior malicious motives which led to the painful split. Problems never ended since then..and If Indians hate Gandhiji for what he has done..then Pakistanis hate him too. Gandhiji has changed their fate forever as well. This is a pure false creation of an anemity between two religious communities. We raise questions.. had it not been for Gandhiji? for Jinnah? for Sardar Patel? My answer is If so? could it have been less painful if everyone had got what they wanted.
We will never know! Some Humans have made mistakes and some others have to bear with the consequences. This is the FACT OF LIFE. It is Injustice..yes, but it's still a fact! And if we are going to sit here and complain about it.. we are the biggest fools on earth. You and I are not scholars of Politics. So what makes us think we can solve the problems of this world that easily? If we create hostility between two nationalities beyond the actual borders of India and Pakistan..more specifically anywhere outside Kashmir...then what are we resolving?
I believe in Today's youth. I see them as a strong potential to see past the historical boundaries and come forward to create a future together. Yes, it sounds pretty cliched at present..but do you have an alternative? Any one can be a critic, but a constructive critic is one should not have the right to put down another person unless he/she has a solution to back it up. I want to tell you that my friendship is "beautiful" because it is not everyday that someone from the other side would wanna join hand in hand with me in a foriegn land. I want to see ppl redefinining friendship beyond borders, culture, and race..Just like we redefine Love beyond language barriers. I have started to become a person who has created in my own way a little world by making friends with people whom You, as a patriot, cannot fathom to be friends with. Every nationality has their flaws just like Indians have.
Is there an end to this battle of thoughts?
There wont be..because two people are looking down the same cliff from different altitudes. The cliff wont change for us. The view won't change but definitely we will change our positions from time to time. I don't have Paki friends. I have friends who are Pakistanis. That's two different things. It is a saddening truth that this can't be explained to a victim of the blasts who has lost his limb. But, folks..Death is a natural phenomenon and it may be true that its occurence and cause is unnatural. If everyone who has experienced death should have such a saddistic view then that person becomes incapable of reasoning at any point in his life. And this is not true. We are made of stronger stuff.
Our past is a fact that cannot be changed at any cost. History cannot be re-written not matter how much we are finding it un-acceptable. Somethings are beyond our understanding and I always hope one can give little bit of gap in their reasoning for these things. We will have boulders in our path in the future, but we have to start learning to dodge it instead of jumping off the road alltogether. These rocks on my path are there to encourage and discourage me. I am insecure if I am going to look at every barrier as a potential death sentence.
A fighter always fights. But, a successful fighter is one who knows when to defend and when to attack. If he goes blindfolded attacking without thinking then he might find himself in the enemy grounds gun pointing to his forehead. DEFENSE IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN ATTACK. A rule of thumb while playing Chess. The city is still living and people are still partying their hearts out. While some of us are sitting here feeling bad and crying with our fellow mates. But, it is not constructive..what we feel. Our body learns to heal itself and come back to normal..so does our society.We need to quit looking at other innocent people as prey for our hatred...bcause this may cause them pain, but it will cause us more. I also want everyone to be happy..and those who are in my reach will surely be receiving this message from me. I don't mind going out and reaching more souls, which is what I have done.
I agree I have my disagreements with my across-border friends at times but the realization I have is that they are worthy of my opponent. I will learn from my enemies more than I would learn from my supporters anyday. True analyzation comes out in contradiction. I wish to think that it will always be a win-win situation because both parties would broaden their point of view. If you feel sad for the souls who were sacrificed then don't sit and cry for them. Their hopes and dreams have been shattered not to shatter you. But, to give u a better incentive to reach someplace where they had once hoped to be. God has given us the power to analyze our world and given us Indians a traditional background to guide us through Life. Paki-terrorists may want our hatred,but India wants everyone's Love. Now, you choose which country's loyalty you want to satisfy...
My friend felt that "They" shouldnt have done this to the simple working people, some who are sole bread earning members. But, he feels proud of the spirit of the city, which has accepted the fact that they are going to get back to work not because they are not afraid, but because they cant sleep hungry in the end of the day.
Mumbai has always been this way since ages. Its a city that lives no matter who or what dies or perishes. Muslims or Hindus hardly matter in these times because if you're a Mumbaiker then you are on the streets helping people out in floods, in earthquakes, and in bomb blasts. Yet, the same religion acts as a barrier for those who have been born across the border. Indian Muslims and Pakistani Muslims wont carry the same weight for a neutral person who wants to make a friendship as compared to a Muslim jawaan who has a certain responsibility in a small forsaken land of Kashmir. Yes, at this moment religion falls low and Nationality takes priority.
What's my verdict? "Insaan ki galti Insaan hi bhuktega..Bhagwaan nahi"( A man's mistake should be paid by a man only..not by God). If Pakistan is playing Devil out here, then where did this Pakistan come from? Somewhere from the pits of the under-world??? It came from History! Pakistan was created by HISTORY. Hatred towards each other was created by HISTORICAL massacres and incidents. If facing a Pakistani makes your mind only drift back to dead bodies that you saw broadcasted in those stations, then it is the result of the hostility border in your mind! A person "does not" want to be friends with them because HE has a problem with the mental hostility, not with the person actually. And if you consider them part of a nation who killed your people, then we should remember that we are also part of the nation that is the Living dead of Aids patients, gave birth to Veerappan, decoits, rapists and also terrorists!
Gandhiji is often blamed for the breakdown of an otherwise co-existing community. Gandhiji had a vision and He stuck to it. While during the partition, some influential leaders had ulterior malicious motives which led to the painful split. Problems never ended since then..and If Indians hate Gandhiji for what he has done..then Pakistanis hate him too. Gandhiji has changed their fate forever as well. This is a pure false creation of an anemity between two religious communities. We raise questions.. had it not been for Gandhiji? for Jinnah? for Sardar Patel? My answer is If so? could it have been less painful if everyone had got what they wanted.
We will never know! Some Humans have made mistakes and some others have to bear with the consequences. This is the FACT OF LIFE. It is Injustice..yes, but it's still a fact! And if we are going to sit here and complain about it.. we are the biggest fools on earth. You and I are not scholars of Politics. So what makes us think we can solve the problems of this world that easily? If we create hostility between two nationalities beyond the actual borders of India and Pakistan..more specifically anywhere outside Kashmir...then what are we resolving?
I believe in Today's youth. I see them as a strong potential to see past the historical boundaries and come forward to create a future together. Yes, it sounds pretty cliched at present..but do you have an alternative? Any one can be a critic, but a constructive critic is one should not have the right to put down another person unless he/she has a solution to back it up. I want to tell you that my friendship is "beautiful" because it is not everyday that someone from the other side would wanna join hand in hand with me in a foriegn land. I want to see ppl redefinining friendship beyond borders, culture, and race..Just like we redefine Love beyond language barriers. I have started to become a person who has created in my own way a little world by making friends with people whom You, as a patriot, cannot fathom to be friends with. Every nationality has their flaws just like Indians have.
Is there an end to this battle of thoughts?
There wont be..because two people are looking down the same cliff from different altitudes. The cliff wont change for us. The view won't change but definitely we will change our positions from time to time. I don't have Paki friends. I have friends who are Pakistanis. That's two different things. It is a saddening truth that this can't be explained to a victim of the blasts who has lost his limb. But, folks..Death is a natural phenomenon and it may be true that its occurence and cause is unnatural. If everyone who has experienced death should have such a saddistic view then that person becomes incapable of reasoning at any point in his life. And this is not true. We are made of stronger stuff.
Our past is a fact that cannot be changed at any cost. History cannot be re-written not matter how much we are finding it un-acceptable. Somethings are beyond our understanding and I always hope one can give little bit of gap in their reasoning for these things. We will have boulders in our path in the future, but we have to start learning to dodge it instead of jumping off the road alltogether. These rocks on my path are there to encourage and discourage me. I am insecure if I am going to look at every barrier as a potential death sentence.
A fighter always fights. But, a successful fighter is one who knows when to defend and when to attack. If he goes blindfolded attacking without thinking then he might find himself in the enemy grounds gun pointing to his forehead. DEFENSE IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN ATTACK. A rule of thumb while playing Chess. The city is still living and people are still partying their hearts out. While some of us are sitting here feeling bad and crying with our fellow mates. But, it is not constructive..what we feel. Our body learns to heal itself and come back to normal..so does our society.We need to quit looking at other innocent people as prey for our hatred...bcause this may cause them pain, but it will cause us more. I also want everyone to be happy..and those who are in my reach will surely be receiving this message from me. I don't mind going out and reaching more souls, which is what I have done.
I agree I have my disagreements with my across-border friends at times but the realization I have is that they are worthy of my opponent. I will learn from my enemies more than I would learn from my supporters anyday. True analyzation comes out in contradiction. I wish to think that it will always be a win-win situation because both parties would broaden their point of view. If you feel sad for the souls who were sacrificed then don't sit and cry for them. Their hopes and dreams have been shattered not to shatter you. But, to give u a better incentive to reach someplace where they had once hoped to be. God has given us the power to analyze our world and given us Indians a traditional background to guide us through Life. Paki-terrorists may want our hatred,but India wants everyone's Love. Now, you choose which country's loyalty you want to satisfy...
Friday, July 07, 2006
MOVIE BLUFF
The past week has got some valuble Bollywood 'showtime' as I got to see three Hindi movies. Invariably, my luck is rotten enough to say that all the three movies are flop! I wouldn't blame the producers or the directors, but I would surely blame the camera man.. because He focused on all the wrong "areas" of the heroes and heroines during the whole movie. :P Presenting to you my review of three flop watched in the past 3 days. They are : OOPS, NEAL n NIKKI, and PAAP.
Interested? then read further...
All three movies have one aspect clearly drawn out : Lots of Skin Showing!
Oh well, being the summer.. this wasnt a tad bit as bad as I thought..But, I got to say I would prefer the winter anyday after seeing the array of clothes (or lack of them)
OOPS..is a movie about a dancer boy who wants to be rich, and therefore turns into a striptease boy..who actually ends up sleeping with a middle-aged woman for money and finds out soon...that the middle aged woman is his best friends's mom!
Kahaani ki twist is good! But, the yuckiest part of the twist is they actually DARED to bring "emotions" and "maa sentiments" in the end. Would you get a load of that?? :P
My final Verdict: Stripteasing for men is Hazardous!!! not just for the best friends but also for the viewers who get a load of "long dialogues" after a lot of 'action'!
NEAL n NIKKI: Now, this u know is a story about a guy(Neal) who is born and brought up in Canada...but who wants to get laid soooo bad...that he ends up tagging along with a psychopath shrieking Banshee girl called Nikki! And He actually ends up thinking Nikki is the best one night stand he can end up with!(courtesy: her bitchy clothes..or the lack of it).
And even though you might hope their brains would start working after all the cooked up chemistry.. you end up figuring out how they ended up losing more brains in the [inter]course of the night! So, Neal goes on to marry the "girl" he is betrothed from(punjab da khet) whose cousin unluckily happens to be our shrieking banshee girl!
But, I must say its a real cool ending though. Nikki tries to stop the marriage.. but hellooo a chooha-like Sardarji stands up bravely and tells everyone that he wants to marry the Bride..bcause they have exchanged vows online!!! Now,with the film providing us with so many brain-less ppl, you actually appreciate the sardarji!
My final Verdict: Neal and Nangi..whoops i mean Nikki dont know how to kiss but you're lucky enough that they kiss a lot because atleast thats one good way to make the screaming banshee Nikki SHUT UP! (oh n not to mention gud way to close the flutter fake eyelashes of the fake-contact-lens-wearing Neal)
PAAP: well, dont get me started on this one...honestly...
Its a story about DALAI LAMA's re-incarnation..(although the movie cover has a half nude JOhn Abraham with an equally half nude girl (who would pass off as a bitch anyday)
Yes, my dear Ppl. presenting to you an A movie with DLama In it..which gave me half grey hair! But, getting back to the movie..they start it off with a sexy girl swimming et all..and end up in a monastry..where she is supposed to be a 'soon-to-be-monk' seeking "TRUTH".
Some facts of LIfe (from the movie)
1) one of those slum area-nepalese boys could be a Dalai Lama's re-incarnation who maybe soughted out by a sexy girl
2)Always check if the bathroom of a top 5 star hotel is deserted..because You never know when a hot-shot famous man with a pistol might appear and kill one of your fellow bathroom mates.
3) Never say the truth to a hot sexy police man because that will prolong the torture of the audience(movie could have ended in half n hour!)
Oh and one of the most important ones
4) a sexy girl's prayers can save a man who has a bullet hole through his stomach!(yup...no docs needed..watsoever!!)
oh and did i forget...
5) after an action packed english movie like fight, a prolonged emotional dialogue by a police guy is what changes the heart of monks!!! So much so that they decide that the sexy girl wanting to have intercourse with an equally hot policeguy is no longer PAAAP..
OH.... THE REVELATION IS TOOO GOOOD!! :P
My final verdict: Too bad John Abraham survives the bloody wound..because it's what trigged a change in the whole Dalai Lama dynasty's thinking!!! Oh.. and the heroine has Asthma problems.. because she keeps breathing too heavily..( although they make us believe it is due to lust..but its actually due to suffocation..somethin that the viewers can relate with very well!!)
Do me a favor, and please send me a list of good ol traditional ENGLISH MOVIES that I can watch and re-deem some of my lost braincells...
Interested? then read further...
All three movies have one aspect clearly drawn out : Lots of Skin Showing!
Oh well, being the summer.. this wasnt a tad bit as bad as I thought..But, I got to say I would prefer the winter anyday after seeing the array of clothes (or lack of them)
OOPS..is a movie about a dancer boy who wants to be rich, and therefore turns into a striptease boy..who actually ends up sleeping with a middle-aged woman for money and finds out soon...that the middle aged woman is his best friends's mom!
Kahaani ki twist is good! But, the yuckiest part of the twist is they actually DARED to bring "emotions" and "maa sentiments" in the end. Would you get a load of that?? :P
My final Verdict: Stripteasing for men is Hazardous!!! not just for the best friends but also for the viewers who get a load of "long dialogues" after a lot of 'action'!
NEAL n NIKKI: Now, this u know is a story about a guy(Neal) who is born and brought up in Canada...but who wants to get laid soooo bad...that he ends up tagging along with a psychopath shrieking Banshee girl called Nikki! And He actually ends up thinking Nikki is the best one night stand he can end up with!(courtesy: her bitchy clothes..or the lack of it).
And even though you might hope their brains would start working after all the cooked up chemistry.. you end up figuring out how they ended up losing more brains in the [inter]course of the night! So, Neal goes on to marry the "girl" he is betrothed from(punjab da khet) whose cousin unluckily happens to be our shrieking banshee girl!
But, I must say its a real cool ending though. Nikki tries to stop the marriage.. but hellooo a chooha-like Sardarji stands up bravely and tells everyone that he wants to marry the Bride..bcause they have exchanged vows online!!! Now,with the film providing us with so many brain-less ppl, you actually appreciate the sardarji!
My final Verdict: Neal and Nangi..whoops i mean Nikki dont know how to kiss but you're lucky enough that they kiss a lot because atleast thats one good way to make the screaming banshee Nikki SHUT UP! (oh n not to mention gud way to close the flutter fake eyelashes of the fake-contact-lens-wearing Neal)
PAAP: well, dont get me started on this one...honestly...
Its a story about DALAI LAMA's re-incarnation..(although the movie cover has a half nude JOhn Abraham with an equally half nude girl (who would pass off as a bitch anyday)
Yes, my dear Ppl. presenting to you an A movie with DLama In it..which gave me half grey hair! But, getting back to the movie..they start it off with a sexy girl swimming et all..and end up in a monastry..where she is supposed to be a 'soon-to-be-monk' seeking "TRUTH".
Some facts of LIfe (from the movie)
1) one of those slum area-nepalese boys could be a Dalai Lama's re-incarnation who maybe soughted out by a sexy girl
2)Always check if the bathroom of a top 5 star hotel is deserted..because You never know when a hot-shot famous man with a pistol might appear and kill one of your fellow bathroom mates.
3) Never say the truth to a hot sexy police man because that will prolong the torture of the audience(movie could have ended in half n hour!)
Oh and one of the most important ones
4) a sexy girl's prayers can save a man who has a bullet hole through his stomach!(yup...no docs needed..watsoever!!)
oh and did i forget...
5) after an action packed english movie like fight, a prolonged emotional dialogue by a police guy is what changes the heart of monks!!! So much so that they decide that the sexy girl wanting to have intercourse with an equally hot policeguy is no longer PAAAP..
OH.... THE REVELATION IS TOOO GOOOD!! :P
My final verdict: Too bad John Abraham survives the bloody wound..because it's what trigged a change in the whole Dalai Lama dynasty's thinking!!! Oh.. and the heroine has Asthma problems.. because she keeps breathing too heavily..( although they make us believe it is due to lust..but its actually due to suffocation..somethin that the viewers can relate with very well!!)
Do me a favor, and please send me a list of good ol traditional ENGLISH MOVIES that I can watch and re-deem some of my lost braincells...
Monday, July 03, 2006
How do you Communicate?
I am currently on this testing-spree..and have put my brain to use in small quantities to come up with more such p.e.r.s.o.n.a.l.i.t.y tests. Soon enough there will be an interesting post coming up! so watch out.. :P
COURTESY: some other Enigma's Blog
| You Communicate With Your Ears |
 You love conversations, both as a listener and a talker. What people say is important to you, and you're often most affected by words, not actions. You love to hear complements from others. And when you're upset, you often talk to yourself. Music is very important to you. It's difficult to find you without your iPod. |
COURTESY: some other Enigma's Blog
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